My local supermarket has a giant roomba. "His" name is Marty and he detects spills including the blood it will shed once it becomes sentient.

Posted Apr 3, 2019 6:11:01 AM

Had to make a birthday cake for my Canadian friend

Posted Apr 3, 2019 1:56:01 AM

Got a new scarf at CVS

Posted Apr 2, 2019 10:41:02 AM

Completely unprompted, my son cut a paper spider out and taped it inside my wife's lampshade and I've never been more proud.

Posted Apr 1, 2019 9:41:06 PM

My high school gov teacher put himself on a cover of Forbes and read it on a plane while he sat in first class for the first time in his life.

Posted Apr 1, 2019 9:41:05 PM

I photoshopped a shark and manatee together and he is my son, my legacy, my prodigy: the Manatark

Posted Apr 1, 2019 7:36:01 PM

April Fools

Posted Apr 1, 2019 5:26:01 PM

The best piece of bathroom graffiti

Posted Apr 1, 2019 2:11:02 AM

Mind blown!

Posted Apr 1, 2019 12:06:02 AM

the anthem of an era

Posted Mar 31, 2019 5:36:01 PM

I'm sure we've all been there Dylan

Posted Mar 31, 2019 3:26:01 PM

The infamous right turn

Posted Mar 31, 2019 4:41:02 AM

As you watch her hammer back 108 beers

Posted Mar 31, 2019 2:36:02 AM

You son of a bitch....

Posted Mar 31, 2019 2:36:01 AM

What the shell are YOU looking at?

Posted Mar 31, 2019 12:26:02 AM like a sir!

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